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the last draft

You know what I hate about writing? You only ever get to see the final draft of what someone has to say. Why is that? Wouldn't it be much more interesting if you could see the messy middle between the beginning of someone's thinking process and the finished product?

I think more people would write more often if they didn't think they had to put their best work out there each time. If instead, you could use your writing surface to flesh out your ideas, and trust the process, there would be no need to worry about the last words you put on the page.

And spoiler alert. It's not just writing. Every act of creation tends to have to deal with this problem. When people fear being judged, it often has very little to do with the start or the middle, and far more to do with the end. Making stuff is easy. Making stuff you're proud of is hard. Making something you think others will appreciate while opening yourself up to judgement is the hardest thing you can do.

But the good news is that it gets easier the more you do it. And more importantly, if you treat the journey as the thing to present, rather than some end state, it makes it much easier to get started.

I'm very thankful that I started writing on the internet 3 years ago with nothing but a hope and a dream. I just wanted a space to explore ideas and do so in a public way. I look back on a lot of my earlier pieces and feel a bit of shame and happiness at how raw and unedited it all is. There was no agenda, no goal, and no expected outcome. But as a result of simply trying to carve out space for an art project like this, I've learned so much more about myself and the people around me.

So, if I had to give advice to someone else with the fear of creating, I would say to do your best not just to trust the process, but to expose it too. After all, your best work, is still a work in progress.

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